Why names matter

“If you want to make friends, make it a point to remember them. If you remember my name, you pay me a subtle compliment; you indicate that I have made an impression on you. Remember my name and you add to my feeling of importance.”

– Dale Carnegie

I like to be remembered. I like it when people address me by name. I give my return business to those airlines, hotels and service providers who consistently remember my name.

Remembering my name is more than just a courtesy. It is recognition of my lifetime value as a client. As Dale Carnegie reminds us, “Remember my name and you add to my feeling of importance.” And when I feel important – to you – I am more likely to pay attention. I am more likely to purchase your product or service. I am more inclined to recommend your business to my friends and colleagues.

Over the years, I have made it a point to address the people that I meet by name.  I am pretty good at it. It takes practice to acquire this skill. It is a skill that you can learn. But this skill is more than just a fun “parlor trick.” It is your key to connecting with people. The people who matter. To you personally, to your business, to your feeling of richness.

Daniel Scocco wrote an interesting article on this subject on the “Daily Blog Tips” site. Click here to read it – and the comments that follow.

I’ll be attending a conference next week. It is an organization that I have belonged to for many years. The people in the organization matter to me. Enough so that I will make a deliberate effort to address each person that I see there by name – before they have a chance to put on their name badge! Here’s what I do:

  • I request a pre-registration list from the organization.
  • As I read each person’s name, I try to picture their face – what they look like.
  • After this step, I go back and review my notes about the last time we met. What is their spouse’s name, the names of their children, their hobbies, etc.

It is an investment in time. But it is an investment that has paid off handsomely over the years. I remember more than their names. I remember the moments that we have shared together. I remember why names matter.

If you want to pick up a few “tricks” to remembering people’s names, click here. It is a good article by Kelley Robertson.

I you want to establish long lasting relationships with friends and clients, think about why names matter.

“Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” – Dale Carnegie

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

Time to read the paper

And a good Sunday morning to you! Today is a rare occasion – I actually have time to sit down and read the Sunday newspaper. Fine, except for one small matter – I no longer have the Sunday New York Times delivered to my home!

I usually don’t have the luxury of time to sit down, sip my coffee and read the paper – section by section, article by article. This morning I had the time, but alas no NY Times in my hand.

Reading the paper on-line is a different experience. There are some aspects of on-line reading that I prefer, some that I do not.

The newspaper on-line offers:

  • Refreshed content – important for news items.
  • Links. I can click to go to similar articles or source material. But… within 10 minutes, guaranteed, I am no longer on the NY Times website reading the paper. Now, I am probably off doing something work-related. I am no longer reading for pleasure.

The traditional paper offers:

  • A tactile experience.
  • A complete experience – I get to glance at articles that I might not have noticed on-line. Some I read, some I don’t. But… just being able to see the “grabber” headline” a visual and a few captions – I probably choose to read more of the Sunday NY Times content when I actually have the paper in my hand. I also notice more advertising with the paper.
  • Portability. Yes, it’s funny but I actually find that the Sunday paper is much more portable. For example, I do not take my laptop into the bathroom to read the paper. If I want to continue reading outside, the paper is adaptable. If I take my laptop outside I never actually manage to read anything – the glare of the sun makes this impossible!
  • A crossword puzzle that I actually enjoy solving.
  • Lots of black newspaper ink on my fingers!

What is your preference – and why? Please share your comments with our readers.

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

5 Great Tips to Improve Your Writing

Click hereto read a really useful article by Simon Payn, “Five Lessons From Newspapers to Boost Your Blog’s Circulation.”

Don’t be put off by the title. You don’t have to be a blogger to benefit from these 5 tips.

Do you write memos? Read the article.

Do you give presentations? Read the article.

If you want to improve your writing skills or presentation skills, you will get great tips on:

  1. Brevity – What if you had to cut your article or presentation by 50%?
  2. A Strong Opening – Capture your audience’s attention at the start.
  3. Use Headlines – Readers like to skim. Give them a road-map.
  4. Visuals. Get the most out of them.
  5. Accuracy. Check your facts, check your spelling, check your links.

Please share some of your favorite tips. What articles have helped to improve your communications?

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

When things go wrong – What will you do?

How did I get so lucky? I flew American Airlines this week – but on Monday. One day before thousands of flights were canceled to comply with an FAA Maintenance requirement. Were I not so lucky, this is all the information that I would have received from the American Airlines’ website:

“We are very sorry for inconveniencing you with the cancellation of a portion of American Airlines’ flights which started on April 8. Additional inspections of our MD-80 fleet are being conducted to ensure precise and complete compliance with the FAA’s directive related to wiring in the aircraft’s wheel wells. For more information about the progress of the inspections, please check our Press Releases. Please be assured that safety of our customers is, and always will be, American’s first priority. For more information about your flight, please check Gates & Times. “

Thanks, but no thanks! I am sure that you are sorry. And I know that this is an extremely stress-filled situation. An airline can not jeopordize passenger safety. But… what about the information break-down? What options do I have? Please direct me to a web-page where I can determine my options for alternative travel.

Here are some comments from the aviation.com website about this “break-down:”

“This writer was one of the thousands of passengers on American who was grounded. I found out about American’s cancellations because, as a journalist, I receive AA press releases. Other passengers were not so lucky: Many didn’t get any heads-up notification about the problems.

I was fortunate. Arpey acknowledged that many AA customers were not notified promptly or at all; some arrived at the airport only to discover that their flight was not going anywhere. “Our employees did the best they could. We apologize for the inconvenience. We did try to reach them,” said Arpey. He didn’t explain how communications broke down, or what American will do differently should cancellations continue in the coming days.”

Look at the televised news reports. See the long lines of frustrated customers waiting (not so) patiently for the chance to talk to a ticket agent. Try to call the airlines reservations number – all circuits are busy; Your business is important to us, please continue to hold…

Where is the technology to help customers obtain information?

One news shot showed a bank of idle ticketing “kiosks” in the middle of a sea of angry, displaced customers. Are the ticketing kiosks only programmed as “dumb terminals?” Can they only spit out boarding passes once you supply them with your ID for a current reservation?

Customers want options. Unfortunately, very few businesses offer these options. Customers are quite willing to “help themselves” if only your business will allow them to do so.Customers want to help you when there is a problem – but you have to provide them some “self-help” options. Continue reading “When things go wrong – What will you do?” »

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

What is your speaking rate?

No, this article is not a discussion about how much you should charge to deliver a speech. Charge as much as you dare – or at least what the market will bear. But first make sure that your content and delivery are top-notch.

Speaking of delivery. How fast or slow do you speak? Do you speak too fast for your audience to understand you? Or so slow that your audience falls asleep or tunes you out?

Walter Cronkite remains one of the most respected communicators in broadcast history. He paid close attention to his delivery:

“Cronkite trained himself to speak at a rate of 124 words per minute in his newscasts, so that viewers could clearly understand him. In contrast, Americans average about 165 words per minute, and fast, difficult to understand talkers speak close to 200 words per minute.

How do you rate? The correct answer is that you should match your number of words per minute (WPM) to fit your audience and the setting for your speech. The larger the room and the larger your audience, the slower you should speak. In a more intimate setting (one-on-one or small group around a table) you can speak faster but be sure to watch your audience’s body language. Watch for clues that you need to either speed up or slow down. We listen with our eyes!

Here are four tips to use as you prepare your next speech or presentation:

  1. When you are rehearsing, be sure to time yourself. Record your time. And record your rehearsals (audio /video)
  2. If you are using PowerPoint, take advantage of the Rehearse Timings feature. (Menu – Slide Show – Rehearse Timings) This will record the amount of time you spend on each slide (or each bullet point) as well as the overall length of your presentation. As a bonus, you can incorporate these timings to allow the slides to advance automatically when you do your presentation.
  3. Prepare a shorter version of your speech. Quite often, you will be asked to “speed it up” because the program is running behind schedule. DON’T! Don’t speed up your delivery – a recipe for disaster. Rather, deliver your streamlined-version. Quite often, this will be the more effective speech – you benefit from brevity!
  4. Always memorize – two parts of your speech: Your first two minutes. Your closing minute.

Pay attention as others speak. How do you react as an audience? As a listener? Does the speaker engage you? Do you follow them? Do you understand them? What is their speaking rate?

Of course, variety is the spice of life. You need to vary your rate of speaking to reflect the tone of your content. Speed up when you are excited; slow down when you are making an important point. And always remember “the power of the pause.”

Learn to master your speaking rate and you will achieve your goal – your message will be heard and understood.

Learn to master your speaking rate and you will be asked back to speak again. Your reputation will grow and more audiences will want to listen to what you have to say. And… the rate that you can charge to speak will also improve. You will be worth it. You will have earned it.

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

Drip, Drip, Drip

Seth Godin posed an intriguing set of questions on his blog the other day:

“What would happen if every single high school student had to have a blog? Or every employee in your company? Or every one of your customers?”

Learn to “Write Like a Blogger,” is Seth’s Advice. He lists 9 key points – and yes, using lists is one of them – that effective bloggers use to make their writing stand out. Great article. Great advice for anyone who wants to improve their written communications. Read it.

That is another point – “Bloggers aren’t afraid to include links or distractions in their writing, because we know you’ll come back if what we had to say was interesting.” So click here for a link to read the article.

The title of this post is “Drip, Drip, Drip.”  That is Seth’s point # 3. You don’t have to say everything at once.

How liberating!

How many articles did I abandon because I felt that I didn’t have the time to tell the complete story? Many.

How many of my posts did my readers abandon because they didn’t have the time to read? Many more than I care to admit. But it is true…

We never have enough time. So don’t waste time. But even more to the point, don’t miss an opportunity to write because you don’t have enough time to write everything.

Write a short note. Make one point. Make it timely. Make it interesting. Make your audience want to read more.

To apply this priniple in a business situation, think about the (dreaded) annual employee “performance appraisal.” Don’t delay giving your employees constructive feedback. Don’t wait for a year to pass by. Do it when you spot the opportunity.

Make one point. Don’t wait to tell the complete story. It will never be complete.

Give feedback on one point. Give it at the time that you spot the opportunity. Keep it positive. Make them want to do more. You will get more of what you point out. So keep your feedback focused on future positive results.

Do it drip by drip by drip. It will carry more impact.

To be continued…

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

If the news is that important, it will find me

As soon as I saw this headline, “CBS Said to Consider Use of CNN in Reporting,” I thought back to this comment:

“If the news is that important, it will find me.”

– A college student responding to a focus group question

I used that comment as the lead-in to a recent post – “The Medium is the Message.”

That innocent answer has stayed with me ever since. Perhaps we are evolving from a “Search for information” age to a “Pass it along to my network” era.

Yes, we still prize “the news that you can trust.” But our trusted sources have now changed. Walter Cronkite earned our trust anchoring the CBS Evening News from 1962 to 1981. He had gravitas. He also had a captive audience. The current CBS Evening News anchor has – I’m not sure since I no longer watch the program – and has a dwindling audience. And little relevance for many.

  • We no longer wait for the news to come on. We are too mobile for that.
  • We can search for the news when we want it. Google has made this so simple to do.
  • Or, we can rely on our trusted network to forward us the news that matters most to them – and to us.

There is so much to look for. So much to search through. So little time. So little trust.

Perhaps the CBS Evening News” is being replaced by the “My Social Network News.” News that you can trust.

If CBS and CNN team up to share resources devoted to reporting the news, what will they do with the savings? Satisfy their investors? Or devote more resources to making their content more important? So important that it finds me!

What do you think? Please add your comments below.

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

Writing vs. E-Mail

Writing my blog helps me to reach clarity of thought. I spend time crafting each post. Editing it. Letting it sit for a few hours before hitting the “Publish” button. I hope my efforts pay off for my readers. I hope that what I write makes sense. I hope that I am being clear.

I just used a lot of “I’s” in that paragraph – on purpose. Continue reading to find out why.

A new study (“Why E-Mails are Often Misunderstood”) points out a stark difference in how our message is understood when we communicate via e-mail vs. the telephone. Click here to go to the study.

Only 56% of the recipients correctly interpreted the e-mail message vs. 73% who correctly interpreted the telephone message.

My immediate reaction when I read the headline was that “the tone of voice” made the difference. Frequently an e-mail is misinterpreted because the recipient can not hear the “tone of voice” that the sender is using.

This study points to another reason for the miscommunication in e-mails: The egocentric viewpoint of the sender.

I, I, I, I, etc.

Senders of e-mail messages are caught up in their own thoughts. So much so that they fail to consider the perspective of their recipient. Why send the e-mail if your reader will not correctly interpret your message?

Good question.

Yes, I commit to writing posts for my blog because, in doing so, my thoughts become clearer – to me. The reason they become clearer to me is that I edit my post before I hit the “Publish” button.

However, I am also writing to share my thoughts with my readers. I hope that I am clear in my communication. I hope that what I write makes sense.

I do know that I do not put as much care into my e-mail communication. Yes, I spell check (automatically) but I seldom re-read my e-mail before hitting the “Send” button. I am in too much of a hurry. For what? To read and respond to the next e-mail?

Why am I responding to the e-mail in the first place? To clarify, to amplify, to confirm. To disagree, fine. To digress… No!

E-Mail is my primary communication vehicle. So why don’t I put as much care into my e-mail messages as I do for the posts on my blog? Good question. Very good question. I will try to change my habits. I want to improve my communications skills. I want to be understood. (All of those “I’s” again!)

What are your thoughts on this topic? Please add your comments below. 

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

Put it in Writing

“Love. Fall in love and stay in love. Write only what you love, and love what you write. The key word is love. You have to get up in the morning and write something you love, something to live for.”

– Ray Bradbury

I am frequently asked, “Why do you blog? Isn’t that a lot of work. Who reads your blog?”

Seth Godin posed another question on his blog last year, “If no one reads your post, does it exist?”

Good questions. Here is how I respond:

  1. Why do you blog? For several reasons, but the primary one is that it helps me to reach clarity. Thinking about a topic is interesting. Writing out my thoughts is commitment. The writing process demands that I edit my thoughts. I am not just writing to amuse myself. I am writing to learn more about the topic – and also about myself in the process.  And I write to share my thoughts and insights with my readers.
  2. Isn’t that a lot of work? Yes.
  3. Who reads your blog? I can’t tell you by name. Some people write to tell me that they enjoy my blog. Others do so when we meet. Looking at my reports, I can at least see which articles are read the most and which search words people used to find my blog. And, obviously you – if you are reading this now. I’d like to know why you read this blog and what you like or don’t like.
  4. If no one reads your post, does it exist? Yes, of course. And it is never lost thanks to the indexing power of Google, etc. That is one of the benefits of blogging – accessible information. Found, when you need to or want to find it.
Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn

Too Comfortable to Disagree

“We find comfort among those who agree with us – growth among those who don’t.”

– Frank A. Clark

Acutally, I think that we grow as a result of both agreement and disagreement.

Recently, I was training a group to develop their coaching and mentoring skills. At the end of the day, we asked each participant to share their “take-aways” with the group. Quite a few expressed relief that the techniques they learned during the session reinforced what they were already doing. They needed the comfort of confirmation. Their self-confidence grew. They will continue to gain skills and grow – to the extent that they resist staying comfortable.

“It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts.” – John Wooden

It is natural to seek agreement. It is unnatural – for most of us – to seek out a different point of view. The opposing argument. The other side of the coin. We fear the unknown. We resist change.

The problem comes when we seem to reach agreement too quickly. Have we looked at all of the possibilities? When we are too eager to see things turn out right, have we overlooked what could go wrong?

“When there are two people in a business who always agree, one of them is unnecessary.” – William Wrigley, Jr.

I enjoy participating in trade association meetings. I get to satisfy my need to be around people who share a common goal. My core beliefs. But I also enjoy the opportunity to grow as a result of “managed conflict.” Seminars and conversations that challenge my point of view. My perceptions. My comfort level. That is how I learn. It’s how I evolve.

“Difference of opinion leads to enquiry, and enquiry to the truth.” – Thomas Jefferson

In my experience, the companies that fail to evolve – to manage the growth of their business – are those that do not seek out opposing points of view. They don’t challenge themselves. But they like to complain.  They are not interested in exploring other approaches to their business They yearn for a return to the way things used to be. The good old days. And they are usually absent from association meetings.

“Conversation means being able to disagree and still continue the discussion.” – Dwight MacDonald

It’s great to seek out comfort. Enjoy it. But don’t cocoon. If you are interested in growth – personal or professional – seek out opportunities for disagreement. Join a sharing group, seek out networking opportunities, participate in your industry association meetings. Find a comfortable place to disagree.

“The reward for always listening when you’d rather be talking is wisdom.” – Anonymous 

Share and Enjoy:
  • Add to favorites
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Technorati
  • Print
  • email
  • Digg
  • StumbleUpon
  • del.icio.us
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Orkut
  • SphereIt
  • Sphinn